In the blink of an eye, another year has passed. It seems long and lonely from the beginning until now, yet time also seems to fly by, and confusion feels heavy. I have been contemplating the meaning of life,
What is life? It seems to repeat itself, aging in cycles, losing things. Perhaps sometimes I don't even know what I'm thinking; I just don't want to live this kind of life anymore.
What are dreams? What is pursuit? There are no goals left.
Every time is spent in anxiety and moderate depression. When I recover, I don't know what I'm thinking. As I age, the only thing that seems to change and increase is perhaps just an additional digit in my bank account.
Day after day, year after year, I don't know what I'm thinking, I don't know what I'm doing. Perhaps this is life, but I don't know what I'm pursuing, nor do I know what I'm dreaming of.
In the confusion, it seems I can see a glimmer of light, yet it feels like it's obscured by dark clouds.
Thoughts are evolving, human nature is lazy; perhaps I am just the lazy type.
The end of this era probably means the rise of something new.
2018/5/18
Office at 16:35